Blonde jokes are all time favorites - read some of the most funny one liners about blondes. They are not just funny, but hilarious!!

Funny Blonde One Liner Jokes

What is it called when a blonde blows in another blond's ear? Data transfer.

Why is it good to have a blonde passenger? You can park in the handicap zone.

What do blondes do after they comb their hair? They pull up their pants.

Why did the blonde scale the glass wall? To see what was on the other side.

What's the difference between a blonde and a mosquito? A mosquito stops sucking when you smack it.

What do you say to a blonde with no arms and no legs? Nice tits!

How do blonde braincells die? Alone.

What do you call a fly buzzing inside a blonde's head? A Space Invader.

Why is 68 the maximum speed for blondes? Because at 69 they blow a rod.

Why can't blondes count to 70? Because 69 is a bit of a mouthful.

What do you call a blonde between two brunettes? A mental block.

What's the difference between a bowling ball and a blonde? You can only fit three fingers inside a bowling ball!

What is the difference betwen a blonde and a Lamborghini? You don't let your friends borrow your Lamborghini.

How do you make a blonde laugh on Saturday? Tell her a joke on Wednesday!

What do you give the blonde that has everything? Penicillin.

What's the difference between a blonde and a computer? You only have to punch information into a computer once.

What did the blonde say when someone blew in her ear? Thanks for the refill.

What do you do if a blonde throws a grenade at you? Pull the pin and throw it back.

What do you do if a blonde throws a grenade at you? Pull the pin and throw it back.

What do you call it when a blonde dies their hair brunette? Artificial intelligence.

A blonde said, "I was worried that my mechanic might try to rip me off, I was relieved when he told me all I needed was turn-signal fluid."

We all have one ginger friend that claims to be "strawberry blonde".

Why did the blond get fired from the banana plantation? Because she threw out all the bent ones.

What did the blonde say when she found out she was pregnant? "Are you sure it's mine?"

What's the difference between a blonde and a washing machine? They both drip when they're fucked.

How does a blonde high-five? She smacks herself in the forehead.

Why doesn't a blonde talk during sex? Because her mother told her never to talk to strangers.

Why are blondes so easy to get into bed? Who cares?

Why does a blond wear a tight skirt? To keep here legs closed.

What can strike a blonde without her even knowing it? A thought.

Why should blondes not be given coffee breaks? It takes too long to retrain them.

Why should blondes not be given coffee breaks? It takes too long to retrain them.

If pink and glitter were vitamins blondes would be the healthiest people alive.

Why do blondes wear underwear? To keep their ankles warm.

Why do only 20 percent of blonde chicks lay Easter eggs? The rest are hunting peckers.

Why does a blonde wear green lipstick? Because red means Stop.

What's the first thing a blonde does in the morning? Introduces themself.

What are the worst six years in a blonde's life? Third Grade!

I'm blonde. What's your excuse?

Why did the blonde stare at a frozen orange juice can for 2 hours? Because it said "concentrate"!

What is a blonde's favorite color? Glitter.

Why do blondes have TGIF on their shoes? Toes go in first!

I'm not dumb, I just have a lot of blonde moments.

What did the blonde say when she saw Cheerios? Donut seeds.

How do you get a blonde to marry you? Tell her she's pregnant.

How do you make a blonde's eyes light up? Shine a flashlight in their ear.

What is a blonde's favorite fairy tale? Humpme Dumpme!

What's the difference between a blonde and a guy? The blonde has the higher sperm count.

What does the Bermuda Triangle and blondes have in common? They've both swallowed a lot of seamen.

How do you confuse a blonde? You don't. They're born that way!