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25 Really Dirty Riddles for Men with Dirty Mind

Dirty Riddles for Men

This post was most recently updated on July 8th, 2020

These dirtly riddles for for men who love some dirty lines. Basically these are riddles with double entendre words. Double entendre phrases open to two interpretations, one of which is usually risqué or indecent. Give them a shot and check the answers by clicking + sign.

These dirty riddles are not meant to be for kids. These riddles are only suitable for adults.

Dirty Riddles for Men

1. What goes up, lets out a load, and then goes back down?
An elevator

2. What does a cow have four of that a woman only has two of?
Legs

3. I sometimes cause pain when I go in. I’ll fill your holes if you ask me to. I ask you to spit not swallow. What am I?
A dentist

4. What do men keep in their pants that their partners sometimes blow?
Money

5. Arnold Schwarzenegger’s is really long. Michael J. Fox’s is really short. Mickey Mouse’s isn’t human. Madonna doesn’t have one. What is it?
A last name

6. What does a dog do that you can step into?
Pants

7. What starts with “p” and ends with “orn” and is really popular in the movie industry?
Popcorn

8. What four letter word begins with “f” and ends with “k”, and if you can’t get one you can use your hands instead?
A fork

9. It’s fun to do but you hate knowing your parents do it too. What is it?
Facebook

10. What four letter word ends in “it” and can be found at the bottom of bird cages?
Grit

11. I’m hard and hairy on the outside but soft and wet on the inside. My name begins with “c”, ends in “t”, and there’s a “u” and “n” in between them. What am i?
A coconut

12. What’s beautiful and natural, but gets long and prickly if it isn’t trimmed regularly?
Grass

13. I have a stiff shaft and my tip penetrates. I come with a quiver. What am I?
An arrow

14. I go in hard and come out soft. I never mind if you blow me. What am I?
Bubblegum

15. What goes in dry and hard but comes out soft and wet?
A sponge

16. What four letter word that ends in “k” means the same as intercourse?
Talk

17. Your finger fits right in it. You play with it when you’re bored. Once you’re married, you’re stuck with the same one forever. What is it?
A ring

18. What’s six inches long, goes in your mouth, and is more fun if it vibrates?
A toothbrush

19. You play with it at night in bed. you’re not allowed to fiddle with it a work. Only very special people are allowed to touch it. What is it?
A smart phone

20. What does every woman have that starts with a “V” and that she can use to get what she wants?
Her voice

21. Every man has one. Some are big, some are small. It feels great when you blow it, but it drips if you aren’t careful. What is it?
A nose

22. What gets longer when pulled, fits between breasts, slides neatly into a hole, has choked people when used improperly, and works best when jerked?
A seatbelt

23. What does a man have that begins with “P” and gets bigger if it’s properly stimulated?
The pupil of his eye

24. What’s white, gooey, sticky, and better to spit than swallow?
Toothpaste

25. What does a man have in his trousers that a lady doesn’t want in her face?
Wrinkles

And one more …

Dirty Riddles for Men
Q: It involves a bed. Some people prefer it on top, while others prefer it on the bottom. What is it?
A bunk bed

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